Screw OCD... I have dishes in my sink!

I am impulsive and disorganized in so many ways that it makes all the OCD people I love and cherish crazy. It's not that I can not be organized. Its actually a lot more simple than that.




 I do not have a natural drive to organize. I have a natural pursuit of memories of moments. I have a yearning to create a solid life. You see,  I am the only child of a father who died young. But it's not that I am trying hard to make sure I live as much as I can just in case something happens to me. Its that I fully understand that I get ONE life. I get ONE chance to make enough memories to fill my head when I am too old to make more. I get ONE time to teach my son how to love, how to fight, and how to believe the that perfection can not be achieved, but happy can be.




My dad always believed that he would die young. He didn't fear it, for him it was just a fact that he had in his head. Because of this belief he made sure he had life insurance and savings and everything taken care of. He understand that life is precious. He understood that anything that prevents someone from LIVING is not good.




Because I am a follower of LIVING life and not just participating in it, I sometimes have dishes that sit in my sink over 24 hours. I occasionally have to turn my dryer on and let it "iron" the wrinkles out of my t-shirts and jeans. I want my son to remember the cuddling on the couch, me saying  prayers with him before kissing him goodnight. I want him to hear me each and every one of the 1,001 times I tell him " I love you," in a day. I have 4,000, 2,000, and 103 pictures in my previous phones ( in that order) because I like to hold on to memories like air. I think that pictures help keep the moments alive. If you have ever been to my house (or in my classroom) you will notice that I have TON of pictures everywhere. If you are friend or family, please feel free to send me more. I will buy more frames.


What if some day I am cursed with Alzheimer's and begin to forget? Maybe the millions of pictures will be my memories, maybe the pictures will serve as a reminder to the care takers that I am a person and not just flesh and clay and air, maybe the pictures will be the bridge that connects my past to my present.




I'd rather die with dishes in my sink and a 1,000 pictures on my wall.